An open letter to idiot drivers

Dear idiot driver

Tell me this; are you that arrogant, that ignorant, that ridiculous and that selfish that you think you are THE only person on the road? You have to be. It is the only way to explain your behaviour!

I am appalled at what I see on a daily basis on our roads and I am certain that I am not alone in this. You don’t have to be a motoring journalist or have an advanced drivers licence to know what I know. It’s simple common sense, surely?

I experience emotions I didn’t know I had when I see the amount of women putting make up on as they sit in traffic. Get up ten minutes earlier ladies! I get that you are all busy, I get you may have kids, you may be running around like a headless chicken in the mornings, but there is no excuse for taking your eye off the road to rather poke a tiny stick in it.

Then, to you, the person who has NO idea what is going on around them. Wake up buddy! There are other people on the road. You can’t just brake to have a look at something, or slow down to find a parking without indicating, you cannot sit at the robot that’s just turned green while you try and find something in your cubby hole. There is someone behind you! Sure, there may not have been anyone there when you last checked TEN MINUTES AGO, but there is now. Be aware! Know your surroundings.

I’m talking to you guys in the fast lane as well. Move over! If you see a car approaching, pull in to the middle lane. You are not supposed to be driving in the far right lane anyway. It is for passing. Therefore, pass and move over. It is not your right to do the speed you want to do and hold up traffic. As much as you like to think it, you do not own the road.

To those of you who don’t use your indicator;  it is not an optional extra. It is not there to look pretty. It is there to tell me, the driver behind you or in front of you, what it is you intend on doing. It’s a really simple thing! It’s not complicated. If you want to turn right or left, flick the little stick behind your steering wheel. If you are slowing down, coming to a stop in a place that you aren’t legally allowed to, put your hazards on…again, it lets me know that something is potentially wrong with your car and/or you are stopping for some unknown reason…either way, it lets me know what you are doing so that I can do what I need to do.

To you chops on your cellphone…it is illegal! Yes, illegal. The same way you don’t go around firing a gun willy-nilly, you don’t use your cellphone when driving. It can be deadly! No, you are not a better driver than anyone else therefore able to multitask. Just because you have gotten away with it until now doesn’t mean you are going to carry on getting away with it. The day you find out you can’t get away from it is the day you kill me or a family member of mine because you are just so important that you just had to reply to that text otherwise the whole world would collapse. News alert: YOU ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT! No one is. Pull over or wait till you have reached your destination, then go for your phone. If you don’t have that kind of discipline, and I assume you do not, put it in the boot where you cannot hear it or reach for it. Or use your hands free kit!

Then, just to the idiot drivers in general, the ones who speed excessively, the ones who overtake on a blind corner or on a blind rise, the ones who have zero patience and take stupid chances, the ones who don’t buckle their kids up, the ones who drive with one finger holding the steering wheel, and especially to those who drive drunk. Catch a wake-up guys! Take a second and picture your beloved wife, husband, child, mother, father, sister, brother, best friend, colleague being taken from you by someone who just HAD to overtake on that blind rise because it meant they would arrive at their destination just one minute sooner. Is it worth it?

I leave you with this you idiotic drivers, you are not as good at driving as you think you are. A confident driver is a good driver. An aware driver is a good driver. Someone who isn’t doing illegal sh!t on the road is a good driver. Someone who takes driving very seriously, who knows just how quickly an accident can happen and just how much concentration it takes to be behind a wheel…this is a good driver. So, get off your silly little high horse, stop trying to be a cowboy on the road, lose the arrogant attitude and try leave your narcissistic behaviour at home before you step in to your car and drive on the road that ALL OF US SHARE.

Driving behaviour starts with each one of us. It is up you. Do the right thing.

I am sure many of you reading this have many more examples of just how badly people drive on our roads. Please share them.

I’m Julz, South African motoring journalist with a passion for cars and a questionable sense of humour. I am not your average motoring journalist, and this is not your average motoring website.

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